A New Look

Because I haven’t already redone my blog a million times…

Procrastination is a horrible thing. I’ve been through ten different themes in the last few hours when I should have been writing. But I get so utterly hung up on the mechanics of finding a style or look I personally like… It all came together when I found the new header photo. It’s a painting by Impressionist artist┬áKonstantin Razumov, and I swear that I will find the money to buy one of his works someday.

Art makes my soul feel at peace.

So once more into the design breach, dear friends. I thought I needed to at least look the part if I’m going to be serious about this writing thing.

//shay

Still here

It’s a strange feeling, going crazy. Like the world is tilting sideways, and no one else can see it, and you’re this close to falling over and hurting yourself. And trying to regain your balance is pretty fucking hard without help.

I had help.

My esteemed friend did a lot of taking. The result is that I feel less like I’m careening off a cliff, at least. But the strange thing is this: I wrote about what was happening to me in my current fan fiction story. I wrote about a character who had their entire sense of self kicked out from under them, and how they had to find whatever was left and recover.

It’s bizarre, and something of a revelation, to have the solution to an existential crisis in something you wrote months ago.

But I’m still here. Maybe I’m not the same person I was last week, but I will adapt. I will not write the same things, and maybe my obsession with writing about identity will lessen, but I WILL write.

I will write.

Hopefully you guys will keep reading.

//shay