I reviewed myself

Good job, me! Clearly you have a bright future as a seller of smut. Although, and I’m sorry to say this… you need to add more sex.

No, really! Don’t cry, me! Your stories are good, really they are. (Except for the description. And the dialogue. And the plotting. Okay maybe I’ll just send you a copy of ‘On Writing’, by Stephen King.) But trust me, me, you need to add more sex.

Sex, especially if it’s unrealistic and stupid, is what brings in the sweet tasty money. Just look at Fifty Shades of Grey! Oh, how you love to bash it, but come on, check out those sales numbers…






GAH. No. Cannot do. I can’t write to a formula any more than I can stand on my nose and recite the digits of pi.


I can do vampires. I WILL do vampires. Yes, even if it’s ridiculous and over-played. And, because I love you all so much and I feel bad that I can’t publish something this week (because it’s not finished yet), here’s the first two parts of the next story. I’m calling it Vigilant. It has vampires in it – my kind of vampires, which do not sparkle why would you even suggest that – as well as other stuff I haven’t really filled out yet. No, I have no idea where I’m going with it, although there will eventually be sex because that’s just how I roll, baby.

Don’t tell me the ending, I don’t want any spoilers! Now to go hunt down some freebie Kindle erotica…


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